Getting Unstuck In 2023 | #03

Author

Tom Harari
December 31, 2022

Getting Unstuck In 2023

No. 03 — read time 4 minutes

Welcome to The Soloist, a weekly newsletter where I share timeless ideas and insights about life, business, and art.

2022 is coming to a close.

Did you accomplish everything you set out to do?

Open a new tab and look at your resolutions/goals/wishes from this time last year?

If you achieved everything, that's awesome. I'm super proud of you.

If you fell short, do you know why?

Chances are if you're like most people, life gets in the way.

What I've found though is that regardless of how hectic life gets sometimes, our minds can either be our biggest advocates or our worst enemies in helping us achieve what we set out to achieve.

One of the biggest changes I made in my life several years back was paying attention to my mind.

Literally just going down a rabbit hole of understanding how and why my brain works the way it does and how it impacts my decisions.

As part of my Master's Thesis at MIT, I got to interview a bunch of scholars, authors, and researchers at the forefront of psychology and cognitive science.

Some of the best frameworks I picked up helped me focus my brain to be more intentional.

And what's better than being present, intentional, and deliberate in achieving the things we want out of life?

Let's dive in...​

Framework 1: STOP Method

The “STOP Method” was developed by Jon Kabat-Zinn.
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It's a 60-second mindfulness technique that works especially well for people that hate the idea of mindfulness.

It goes like this. Anytime you're feeling stressed, overwhelmed, or mindlessly doing something you shouldn't be doing (i.e. reaching for that tub of peanut butter), you...
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S: Stop what you’re doing. Pause.
T: Take a breath. Let it anchor your to the moment.
O: Observe. Pay close attention to what’s happening in your brain, your body, etc.
P: Proceed. Do you want to continue what you were doing? Do you want to change?

The point being that so much of our behaviors can be unconscious. We don't even realize we're picking our cuticles or binge eating or doom scolling instagram.

And the root causes are where we should be placing our attention.

You can set all the site blocking apps you want and hide the peanut butter but if you don't address the root cause you're going to face an uphill battle.

STOP works because it forces you to confront what's going on inside of you instead of just continuing on auto-pilot mode.

The result?
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No more impulsive eating.
No more hiding your voice.
No more negative self-judgment.
No more insecure feelings driving your behavior.
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Just you, back in the driver’s seat deciding how you want to live your day.
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So when life hits you in the face and your 2023 goals are at risk...
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STOP.
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Remind yourself.
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You control your brain. Not the other way around.

Framework 2: Breathing

OK before you think I've lost my mind, hear me out.

Breathwork, as a practice, is a game changer.

I can hear it already. "Dude, we breathe every second of the day, what on earth are you going on about?"

This isn't just mindless breathing. It's deliberate, intentional, and has the power to completely alter your mental state.

I was first introduced to breathwork by hearing about Wim Hof, aka The Iceman, a crazy dutch guy who uses the power of breathwork to accomplish feats like sitting in a block of ice or hiking snow capped mountains in shorts and no shirt.

Then I met my friend Robbie Bent through the On-Deck Founders community when he was just starting to build out Othership, a breathwork community/app/spa.

Breathwork is a powerful tool that I think most people would see immediate results from.

Some of the scientific backed benefits of breathwork:

  • Reduces stress and anxiety

  • Increases energy and boosts immunity

  • Lowers blood pressure and improves circulation

  • Helps manage pain

  • Strengthens lungs

  • Improves mood and self-esteem

  • Releases toxins

  • Improves sleep

Here's a starter lesson to try it out:

​https://www.othership.us/app (scroll down a bit to try on of their most popular lessons)

Framework 3: 21 Days of Abundance

​Deepak Chopra has a free 21-day mindfulness meditation series on Spotify.

It's surprisingly really good.

It take 10-15 minutes per day and is basically a guided meditation.

My friend and former co-founder Itay Forer, a mentor and coach to startup founders, introduced me to it over the summer.

The biggest takeaways:

  • Gratitude is a building block of rewiring the brain to fight stress and worry

  • Living a life of true purpose is how you create abundance

  • Give and keep giving in order to receive

The lessons are short and pack a punch.

Check it out here:

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Takeaways

  1. STOP Method for in the heat of the moment mindfulness

  2. Breathwork as a practice to reduce stressa and increase energy

  3. 21-Days of Abundance to start of 2023 on a high note

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I hope this week's newsletter was helpful. These mindfulness techniques helped me have an absolute monster year in 2022 and I hope they help you achieve everything you want to achieve in 2023.

Have an amazing New Year's Eve.P.S. Whenever you're ready, there are 3 ways I can help you:

  1. If you save a lot of bookmarks on Twitter (like me), try dewey. —
    the easiest way to organize Twitter bookmarks (I'm one of the makers).

  2. If you're looking for coaching on audience growth book a slot here.

  3. I’m putting together a course on how to network online to grow faster. If you’re interested sign up here.

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